Doppelgänger Germany Information Integration USA

15 Für 15: Standesamt Hochzeit

I came up with this post after reading Shah’s comment on my last blog entry. I got married here in Germany so this post is totally based on my experience.

Firstly, ich muss sagen, that every Stadt is different so the required documents may or may not be the same. The one important rule is to go into your local Rathaus und ask. They will easily answer all your questions and give you better information than anything online because rules can change and may sometimes not be immediately updated online.

So this post is based on one spouse being German and the other ein Ausländer.

Before I arrived Germany, Gorgeousness already asked at the city’s Standesamt about what documents I needed before we could get legally married. This he did because every other option just wasn’t working out. We didn’t have enough Geld for a Vegas wedding(which would have actually been cool oder?!) And going to Denmark was out of the question because the German law wasn’t accepting that sneaky method anymore! Which would have been so much easier. I must say that Gorgeousness always doing the right thing has helped us out in so many ways(not that I’m a lawbreaker of course!) But it was this trait that made him say: to hell with it, I’m walking into the Rathaus! A lot of people online discouraged us. Oh don’t bother marrying a German person, the requirements are impossible, don’t waste your time…u get the point abi? Ehen so imagine my Angst while waiting for his call!

Anyways, I was asked for a six months old birth certificate, a letter from the American embassy stating I was single and a letter of approval from my father. And of course, a valid passport. All these were to be translated into Deutsch. We were also asked to bring along a translator or pay them to get us one. Our first choice didn’t have a valid identity card so he asked his mum and she agreed which I thought was really nice. And she is such a pretty woman.

Now I was certain getting a new birth cert would be like searching for a needle in a haystack but surprisingly, it was a total cup of tea. The embassy gave me a link where I could order for a new certificate and it cost us about 50€ more or less to have it made and posted and it took four weeks I believe. Then we made an appointment for my single status document at the embassy.

With the approval letter from my father and all other documents, we made a termin at the Standesamt and with our translator, we went in.

A lot of questions I don’t recall were asked. But nothing million dollar like. We were also informed on the laws of marriage, our religion, taking his name or keeping mine, combining the American marrying laws with the German and all that jazz. Just for the record, if you registered as a dual citizen, you will be asked which country’s law you want to marry with alongside the German law. Choose wisely(pulling right ear!! Lol)

Then we were given a wedding date for a month from then.

To be honest, I didn’t think the date would be so near. I wanted my sister present but with that timing, it was just not possible. There really wasn’t any chance to plan so I’m looking fwd to us having our church wedding. Yes, I’m wearing a white dress!

I used to dream about ball gowns and princessy feels aber jetzt muss ich realistisch sein. Viele ball gowns sind sehr teuer and auf jedenfalls wird mein Brautkleid schön sein! Duh!

I have all these amazing plans and thankfully, Gorgeousness isn’t up for anything big which def helps with the planning Gott sei dank!

Oh and apparently, there is such a thing as a German wedding. It’s a bit more like the Bavarian culture but these days, everyone just pops in and out of the Rathaus.

So, bist du ein Ausländer? Möchtest du in Deutschland heiraten? Dann geht einfach in ein Standesamt und frag dort! Ganz ganz wichtig.



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  • Clara

    This is good to know! I mean I probably will not get married in the German system, but I guess the process will be similar in most European (non-British) countries. I don’t like the idea of them choosing the date though, leaves little time and opportunity to plan. Still, when you’re with your lovely, nothing else matter I guess…

    It was amazing to see you again last week, looking forward to the next visit.

    Have a lovely week,

    • Yeah well for the standesamt yes but think about how much stress is taken off of you?! haha yes indeed, the lovely trumps every time oder? !
      was totally great seeing you again and I hope we make another date to hook up, this time we go further and not just hang around the dom. Mediapark is totally cool we can check that out some day

  • Duru John de Beloved

    Interesting! Simply amazingly interesting 🙂 So we have to go through all these many many processes just to get married,.. Hian! nawa oh! It is on days like this that I like my Village, Tribe and country.. All i need is for my geh friend to tell me “JdB I am Pregnant” and then bam! We go to her village. carry palm wine and pay small money and e haf finish.. marriage e haf end.. heheheheh This was such an interesting read, and moreso, the fact that you had me shuttling between this post and google Translate 😉 made it more endearing.. Egbon, there is some kinda excitement i get when i am about to read ya post (**Whispers.. I was dancing while the blog was loading today.. I really did) cause i know that no how no how its definitely gonna leave me with a smile.. and the crowd goes.. Ooossshhheeey Turn uP! **Winks.. 🙂

    P.S: As per your number 1 fan.. We shall be waiting for the Ball Dress PicSHur lori Instagram.. and Expensive or not.. i am sure you will look amazing in the final pick… and the crowd goes Awwwggghhh 🙂

    • Hahaha duru in my opinion it totally beats the villa method but that’s just me and you know my stand on certain traditions! Still drafting a post about that lol. I’m definitely getting you to speak German abi ! You should pay me soon!
      Thank you for the vote of confidence but ball gowns are now a thing of the past…..denke ich lol

  • Adaeze

    Please post pictures! Weddings can be stressful no matter where they hold. I’m glad you got your big day

    • I definitely will post pictures when the day happens Adaeze and thank you.

  • Julie

    So your comment on my blog post made me check out yours. Hi there! 🙂

    We got married in Nigeria back in the day…it was more chaotic then anything I’ve ever experienced. Probably, because it was also my very first time being in Nigeria. Applying for a spouse visa at the German embassy was a complete hassle, but what can you do, right?

    Getting married in Germany was out of the question at that time. Thank God everything went smoothly at the Standesamt once we were back in Germany. The best part was when I tried to change my last name. The guy there asked me like 6 times if I was absolutely sure that I wanted to give up my name and that nobody forced me to take this step, ha! The cliches will NEVER die…

    Grüße aus Mönchengladbach (right around the corner…see how small even the Internet is!)

    • Lol I had a similar experience. In fact Gorgeousness was mighty surprised that I agreed to take his name.
      oh let’s not delve in to the chaotic crap that goes on at the embassy. the several occasions I was at the embassy in Lagos with a friend trying to get visa for her mum, it upset me the way the guards treated the applicants and I kept repeating a mantra in my head….This would never happen to you!
      Mönchengladbach? Wow that’s totally close by!

  • La Deutsche Diva

    When you say Shah you meant me right? Hehehe. You need a letter from your FATHER?!?! Well I guess I’m not getting married then. Mine didn’t sign the birth certificate. But that’s another story for another day.


    La Deutsche Diva — The Denglisch Blog
    German on top | English on the bottom

    • Lol wer noch? Well, my father was alive at the time. But couldn’t do much writing so my mum signed on his behalf. I’m guessing father or strong rep works also. However, they didn’t ask for it again when we got there

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